...it’s time for the “Most Hated-On” award in the “NBA” division. Coming to the stage to a round of boos are presenters Anthony Peeler and Rick Rickert.
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Rickert: So without further ado, let me give you the nominations for Most Hated-On NBA Dude of the Year. First up … Kobe Bryant.
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The next nominee is … Tony Parker.
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The next nominee … Yao Ming, a.k.a. “Soft Serve.” And the fourth nominee … The WNBA.
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And finally, the one and only … Kevin Garnett. KG is nominated for picking on little point guards, cussing out benchwarming rookies, making 300-pounders cry, and acting the exact same way he’s been acting for 12 years, but doing it AFTER he won a ring. DAMN, THAT’S HATE-WORTHY!
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Peeler: And the winner of the ‘08 Most Hated-On NBA Dude award is … Kevin Garnett!
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Garnett: First off, I’d like to thank Danny Ainge, for bringing me to Boston and giving everyone their only good reason to hate on me. Then I wanna thank Ray Allen and Paul Pierce, for helping me win 66 games last year and getting everyone on our collective d***, and of course I wanna thank Kobe and his Lakers for giving me my first championship so easily. Next I wanna thank the national media for amplifying my so-called ‘antics,’ the same s*** I did in Minnesota for a dozen years in front of 215 League Pass viewers a night, but now I get to do on national TV twice a week.
Finally I wanna thank the so-called fans, the ones who loved me like none other and praised my intensity and passion, and now that I got a ring, think I should change and start acting like a skinny Tim Duncan, or a taller Shane Battier all of a sudden. And as I sip my Gatorade that I’m sure somebody spit in, I just would like to say to all of you — kiss my ass, you rotten muthaf******. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna go home and watch myself sit on top of the world again, back when the hating first started. Good evening!